Golden Retrievers don’t ignore commands because they’re dumb or “bad,” they ignore them because they’ve learned they don’t have to listen.
That’s the part most people hate hearing, but it’s usually the truth. A stubborn Golden isn’t broken, she’s just confident, distracted, and slightly too smart for her own good.
The good news is you can absolutely train her, and once she starts listening, she’ll become one of the most enjoyable dogs you’ve ever lived with.
The annoying part is you can’t rely on vibes, yelling, or random YouTube tips. You need structure, timing, and a little bit of strategic bribery.
Why Golden Retrievers Act Stubborn (Even When They’re Smart)
Golden Retrievers often act stubborn because they don’t feel pressure to cooperate, not because they don’t understand what you want.
They’re social dogs, but they’re also independent thinkers, and they love doing whatever brings the biggest reward. If your dog thinks sniffing the grass beats sitting on command, guess what she’s doing.
A lot of people assume Golden Retrievers should naturally behave because they’re “family dogs,” and honestly that expectation causes most of the frustration.
Goldens can be sweet, affectionate, and still completely ignore you the moment something more exciting shows up. Their friendliness makes them feel easy, but their curiosity makes them challenging.
Stubborn vs. Distracted (They Aren’t the Same Thing)
Many “stubborn” Goldens actually feel overwhelmed by distractions, especially outside. Your dog might sit perfectly in the living room, then act like she’s never heard the word “sit” in her life at the park. That’s not stubbornness, that’s your training not being strong enough in real-world environments.
Dogs don’t generalize commands well, which means “sit” at home and “sit” at the park feel like two different skills. You have to train in multiple locations before it truly becomes reliable. If you don’t, your Golden will act like you speak a foreign language the second she leaves the house.
They’re Reward Calculators, Not Rule Followers
Golden Retrievers run on a reward system, not a moral system. They don’t sit because they respect you, they sit because it benefits them. If your dog gets treats, praise, or play from listening, she’ll listen more often.
If your Golden ignores you and still gets to go outside, still gets petted, or still gets what she wants, she learns a simple lesson. She learns that your commands don’t matter. This is why consistency matters more than intensity.
You Might Accidentally Be Training the Stubbornness
People accidentally reward stubborn behavior all the time. They repeat the command five times, the dog finally listens, and then they give a treat. That teaches the dog that listening on the fifth attempt pays the same as listening on the first attempt.
You also reinforce stubbornness when you give attention after bad behavior. A Golden Retriever loves attention so much that even scolding can feel like a reward. It sounds unfair, but your dog doesn’t care about fairness, she cares about results.
The Biggest Mistakes People Make With “Stubborn” Goldens
The biggest training mistakes don’t come from laziness, they come from confusion. Most owners genuinely try hard, but they try random things without a clear system. A Golden Retriever will happily take advantage of that chaos.
I’ve watched people turn a perfectly trainable Golden into a total brat just by being inconsistent. The dog didn’t become stubborn overnight, she simply figured out the rules change depending on the mood of the human. Once a dog learns that, she starts negotiating everything.
Repeating Commands Like a Broken Alarm Clock
If you say “sit” ten times, you basically teach your dog that “sit” means “ignore me until I get louder.” Dogs learn patterns fast, and repetition becomes background noise. Your Golden will literally wait you out.
You want your command to mean something, so you should say it once and then guide the dog into the behavior. If she doesn’t respond, don’t keep talking, just calmly reset and try again.
Training When the Dog Has Zero Motivation
If your Golden already ate dinner, already played for an hour, and now she’s tired and full, she won’t care about your training session. Training needs motivation, and motivation usually comes from food, toys, or access to something fun. A dog that doesn’t want anything won’t work for anything.
This doesn’t mean you should starve your dog, obviously. It just means you should train before meals or use higher-value rewards. Training works best when your dog actually wants to earn something.
Expecting Obedience Without Teaching It
A lot of people treat obedience like it’s a personality trait. They say things like, “She’s just stubborn,” when the real issue is they never trained the dog in a structured way. Dogs don’t automatically understand what “good behavior” means.
Goldens are especially tricky because they look friendly even when they’re ignoring you. So owners forgive the behavior because the dog isn’t aggressive, she’s just goofy. Then one day the goofy behavior becomes a real problem.
Using Harsh Punishment and Expecting It to Fix Everything
Some people get frustrated and try yelling, leash jerks, or intimidation. That might shut a dog down temporarily, but it doesn’t build real obedience. Goldens often respond to harshness by either getting anxious or becoming sneakier.
A stubborn Golden doesn’t need fear, she needs clear rules and consistent rewards. If you scare her into obeying, she might listen near you but ignore you the second you aren’t watching. That’s not training, that’s surveillance.
How to Build Real Respect Without Being Mean
Respect in dog training doesn’t come from dominance or being “the alpha.” It comes from consistency and follow-through. Your Golden listens when she believes your commands always matter, not when she thinks you’re the boss of the universe.
If you act unpredictable, your dog will act unpredictable. If you act calm and consistent, your dog starts trusting the system. Dogs love routines, even when they pretend they don’t.
Stop Negotiating With Your Dog
This is where most people fail. They say “come,” the dog ignores, then they start begging, clapping, calling, and offering random deals like a desperate salesperson. Your Golden sees this and thinks, “Oh, we’re negotiating now.”
You need to give commands like you mean them. Say it once, then guide your dog into it, even if it takes a leash or body positioning. Once your Golden learns that ignoring doesn’t work, she stops trying.
Make Listening the Best Deal in the Room
If your Golden gets more fun from chasing birds, meeting strangers, or sniffing a bush, she’ll choose that over you. You can’t compete with the world using boring rewards. You need to become more interesting.
This doesn’t mean you need to act ridiculous, but you do need to bring high-value treats and use an upbeat tone. When I train Goldens, I treat obedience like a game, because they love games.
Calm Energy Wins Every Time
Goldens don’t respond well to chaotic energy. If you get frustrated and start yelling, your dog either gets stressed or gets excited, and neither one helps. Calm confidence works better than anger.
When you stay calm, your dog stays thinking. When you get emotional, your dog gets emotional too. Training needs clarity, not drama.
The Best Training Method for a Stubborn Golden Retriever
The best approach for stubborn Goldens is reward-based training with firm boundaries. That means you reward the behaviors you want and prevent the behaviors you don’t want. It sounds simple, but it works ridiculously well.
Your dog needs to believe that listening brings rewards and ignoring brings nothing. That’s how you build reliability without turning training into a battle. If you stay consistent, your Golden will start responding faster than you expect.
Use the “Yes” Marker Method
A marker word like “yes” tells your dog the exact moment she did something right. This speeds up learning because your dog stops guessing. If you don’t use a marker, your dog often doesn’t know what earned the treat.
Pick one marker word and use it consistently. I like “yes” because it’s quick and natural. Say “yes” the moment your dog sits, then reward immediately.
Reward Timing Matters More Than Reward Size
You can give tiny treats and still get amazing results if your timing is sharp. If your timing is sloppy, even expensive treats won’t fix it. Dogs learn through cause and effect, and timing controls that.
If you reward too late, your Golden might think she earned the treat for sniffing the floor or scratching her ear. That’s how training accidentally goes sideways.
Train in Short Sessions, Not Long Ones
Goldens get bored fast, especially stubborn ones. Long training sessions feel like homework, and your dog will start zoning out. Short sessions feel like fun.
Stick to 5–10 minutes at a time. Do two or three sessions per day instead of one long session. You’ll get better results with less frustration.
Step-by-Step: Training Commands That Actually Stick
If you want your Golden to listen consistently, you need to teach commands in a specific order. You can’t just throw every command at her and hope something sticks. Dogs learn best when you build skills like stacking blocks.
Start indoors, then slowly add distractions. Don’t rush the process or your Golden will fall apart outside. I’ve learned that Goldens love to embarrass you in public, so train like you’re preparing for that.
Step 1: Teach “Sit” the Right Way
Hold a treat near your dog’s nose and slowly move it up and back. Her head will go up and her butt will drop down. The second her butt hits the floor, say “yes” and reward.
Once she understands the motion, add the word “sit” before you lure. Then slowly fade the lure and reward only when she responds to the word. Keep it simple and don’t overthink it.
Step 2: Teach “Down” Without Wrestling
Bring a treat from your dog’s nose straight down to the floor. Then slowly drag it forward so she follows and lies down. The moment her elbows touch the ground, mark and reward.
Some Goldens resist down because it feels submissive, so don’t force it. Make it comfortable and reward heavily. Once she likes the position, she’ll offer it more easily.
Step 3: Teach “Stay” Like a Real Skill
Most people teach stay too early and ruin it. Start by asking for a sit, then pause for one second, say “yes,” and reward. Slowly increase the time, then add distance, then add distractions.
Stay works best when you treat it like a building process. If you jump from two seconds to twenty seconds, your Golden will fail and you’ll both get annoyed. Slow progress beats random leaps.
Step 4: Teach “Come” Like It’s Life or Death
Come is the most important command, and people usually destroy it by calling their dog for bad things. If you call your Golden and then clip her leash, end playtime, or give a bath, she’ll start avoiding you.
You should reward “come” like it’s the best thing ever. Use high-value treats and praise like your dog just won the Olympics. Make coming to you feel like a jackpot.
Step 5: Teach “Leave It” to Stop Bad Habits
Hold a treat in your closed fist and let your Golden sniff it. She’ll lick and paw at it because Goldens have no dignity when food is involved. The moment she stops trying, say “yes” and give a different treat from your other hand.
That teaches her that leaving the tempting thing earns a better reward. Once she understands, practice with food on the floor and eventually with real-world distractions. This command saves your sanity.
How to Fix Selective Listening (The #1 Golden Retriever Problem)
Selective listening drives people crazy because it feels personal. Your Golden listens when she feels like it, then ignores you when she gets distracted. She acts like she has opinions about your authority, and honestly she probably does.
The fix involves two things: making rewards meaningful and controlling the environment. If your Golden can ignore you without consequences, she will keep doing it. Dogs do what works.
Stop Giving Commands You Can’t Enforce
If your dog ignores “come” at the park and you can’t make her come, you just taught her that “come” is optional. That makes your training worse every time. Only give commands when you can follow through.
Use a long training leash outside so you can guide your dog back. That way the command always matters. It’s not mean, it’s just smart.
Use a Long Line Like a Secret Weapon
A long line gives your Golden freedom while still keeping control. You can practice recall, stay, and heel without risking your dog running off. It also prevents the dog from learning that distance equals independence.
Start with 15–30 feet and practice in open spaces. When your dog ignores you, calmly reel her in without yelling. The long line teaches her that she can’t escape the command.
Reward Randomly Once She Gets Good
Once your Golden listens reliably, stop rewarding every single time. Keep rewarding sometimes, but make it unpredictable. Dogs love gambling, and variable rewards make obedience stronger.
If your dog never knows when the treat is coming, she’ll keep trying. It’s basically a slot machine strategy, and yes it works on Goldens way too well.
How to Train a Golden Retriever Who Pulls on the Leash
Golden Retrievers pull because they get rewarded for pulling. Every time they drag you toward something interesting, they win. Your dog doesn’t pull to be disrespectful, she pulls because it works.
Loose leash walking takes patience, but it’s not complicated. You just need a plan and the willingness to look slightly ridiculous while training. I promise the results feel worth it.
The “Stop and Freeze” Method
When your dog pulls, stop walking immediately. Don’t jerk the leash or yell, just freeze like a statue. The moment your dog turns back or loosens the leash, mark and reward.
This teaches your dog that pulling stops the walk. Goldens hate losing forward movement, so they learn quickly. It feels slow at first, but it builds real habits.
Reward the Position You Want
When your Golden walks beside you with a loose leash, reward her. If you only reward sitting or tricks, your dog won’t care about walking nicely. Dogs repeat what gets rewarded.
Use small treats and reward frequently in the beginning. Over time you can reduce the treats and use praise or occasional rewards. Don’t rush the process.
Avoid Gear That Encourages Pulling
A basic collar can make pulling worse because the dog leans into it. A front-clip harness often works better because it turns the dog slightly when she pulls. It doesn’t hurt, it just redirects.
Avoid retractable leashes if you care about leash manners. Those leashes literally teach dogs that pulling creates more leash. They’re basically pulling machines.
How to Train a Golden Retriever to Stop Jumping on People
Golden Retrievers jump because humans reward it. People pet them, talk to them, laugh, and act excited. Your Golden thinks she just found the ultimate greeting strategy.
Jumping feels cute when your dog weighs 25 pounds. It feels less cute when she weighs 70 pounds and tackles your guests like a furry linebacker. You need to fix it early.
Teach “Four on the Floor”
Reward your Golden when all four paws stay on the ground. If she jumps, remove attention immediately. Turn away, cross your arms, and act boring.
The moment she calms down, reward her with attention. Goldens crave attention, so this method works well. You just need everyone in the house to follow the same rules.
Teach a Replacement Behavior Like “Sit to Say Hi”
Dogs don’t stop behavior unless you replace it with something else. Teach your Golden that sitting earns attention. If she wants pets, she sits.
This feels almost magical once it clicks. Your dog starts offering sits automatically because she knows it gets her what she wants. That’s the kind of stubbornness you actually enjoy.
Practice With Real People, Not Just You
Your Golden might behave perfectly with you and still jump on guests. That’s normal because guests feel exciting. You need practice sessions with friends or family members.
Tell people not to pet your dog when she jumps. Most humans mess this up, so you may need to coach them like they’re the ones in training. Honestly, they kind of are.
How to Handle a Golden Retriever Who Gets Too Excited
Goldens often get overstimulated, and that excitement looks like stubbornness. They start zooming, barking, ignoring commands, and acting like they drank six energy drinks. Your dog doesn’t feel “bad,” she feels overwhelmed.
You can’t train a dog who’s mentally exploding. You need to teach calmness like it’s a skill. Calm behavior doesn’t magically appear, your Golden has to learn it.
Teach “Place” or “Settle”
A “place” command means your dog goes to a bed or mat and stays there. This gives your Golden a job when she feels excited. It also helps when guests arrive or when you eat dinner.
Start by rewarding your dog for stepping onto the mat. Then reward for staying longer. Over time, your Golden will learn that calm behavior on the mat earns good things.
Use Calm Rewards, Not Hyped-Up Praise
If your dog already feels excited, don’t reward her with high-pitched squealing. That will just fire her up more. Reward with calm praise and steady treats.
I know it feels natural to hype up a Golden because they’re adorable, but that habit backfires. Calm energy creates calm behavior. Your dog mirrors your vibe more than you realize.
Give Your Golden a Daily “Brain Workout”
Physical exercise helps, but mental exercise works even better for stubborn dogs. Training games, sniffing activities, and puzzle toys tire your dog out in a healthier way.
Try things like:
- Hide treats around the house and let her sniff them out
- Practice short obedience drills before meals
- Teach silly tricks like spin, shake, or bow
- Use food puzzles instead of a normal bowl
A mentally satisfied Golden listens better because she doesn’t feel restless.
The Best Rewards for Training a Stubborn Golden Retriever
Some Goldens will work for plain kibble, but most stubborn ones won’t. A stubborn Golden usually needs higher-value rewards to stay focused. If your treats feel boring, your dog will act bored too.
I always tell people to stop being stingy with rewards during training. You can reduce treats later once your dog listens consistently. Right now, you’re building habits, and habits need strong motivation.
High-Value Treats That Actually Work
These treats usually get strong responses from Goldens:
- Cooked chicken pieces
- Cheese cubes (small ones, unless you want a gassy dog)
- Freeze-dried liver
- Hot dog slices
- Meat-based soft training treats
Keep the pieces tiny so you don’t overfeed. Your dog doesn’t need a full meal per reward, she just needs a taste.
Use Toys for Dogs Who Love Play
Some Goldens care more about toys than food. If your dog loves tug or fetch, use that as a reward. A quick tug session can motivate your dog like crazy.
This also helps your dog focus in distracting environments. When you become the source of fun, your dog starts paying attention. That’s when training gets way easier.
Don’t Bribe Forever, But Bribe at First
People worry about “spoiling” their dog with treats. I get it, but honestly that fear causes more training failure than anything else. Treats aren’t bribery when you use them correctly, they’re payment for effort.
Once your Golden understands a command, you slowly reduce treats and replace them with praise or random rewards. But early on, treat-heavy training builds speed and enthusiasm.
How Long It Takes to Train a Stubborn Golden Retriever
A stubborn Golden Retriever usually shows noticeable improvement in 2–4 weeks if you train consistently. You’ll see bigger changes in 2–3 months, especially if you work on recall, leash manners, and impulse control. The timeline depends more on you than the dog, which sounds harsh but it’s true.
Dogs learn through repetition and consistency, not magical breakthroughs. If you train for five minutes once a week, your Golden will stay stubborn forever. If you train daily, she’ll start acting like a totally different dog.
What Consistency Actually Looks Like
Consistency means you respond the same way every time. If your dog jumps and you pet her sometimes but scold her other times, she won’t stop. She’ll keep gambling because sometimes it works.
It also means everyone in the household follows the same rules. Goldens love finding the easiest human to manipulate, and they’re ridiculously good at it. If one person caves, your dog will target them like a professional.
Training Progress Comes in Waves
Your Golden might improve for a week, then suddenly act worse. That doesn’t mean training failed, it means your dog hit a new phase of learning. Dogs test boundaries when they start understanding rules.
This is the moment when people quit. If you push through that phase, your Golden usually becomes more reliable right after. It’s annoying, but it’s normal.
Puppies vs. Adults (Yes, It Matters)
Puppies learn faster but get distracted easily. Adult Goldens learn slower but often focus better once they understand the system. Either way, training works if you stay consistent.
Older dogs can absolutely learn new habits. I’ve seen adult Goldens completely transform in a couple months. They don’t lose their personality, they just lose the chaos.
Conclusion
Training a stubborn Golden Retriever comes down to one simple truth: your dog listens when listening consistently benefits her. If you stay calm, stop repeating commands, and reward the right behaviors, you’ll start seeing real progress faster than you expect.
Goldens act stubborn because they’re confident and easily distracted, not because they’re hopeless. Stick to short daily sessions, use better rewards, and don’t let your dog negotiate the rules. Once she starts respecting your commands, you’ll finally get that sweet, loyal Golden everyone talks about.

I’m Pallab Kishore, the owner of Little Pets Realm — an animal lover and pet care enthusiast sharing easy tips, healthy recipes, and honest advice to help every small pet live a happy, healthy, tail-wagging life.